is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Randomize
