lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
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