when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
