You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
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