Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
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