i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
