Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
im having a threesome with these popsicles
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
It is 3am. I'm at a pizzeria with my 4 friends. The one to my right is throwing up on herself, the one to my left is crying hysterically by herself, the one in front of me is passed out on the table, and the other is trying to find a taxi and I'm pretty sure a guy is sticking his hand up her skirt. Tourists are taking pictures. Help me.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
Randomize
