I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Randomize
