this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
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