there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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