New invention idea: vibrating tampons
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
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