Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Randomize
