ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
I think my fart just growled at me.
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize
