Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
