That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
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