That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Randomize
