lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
I was to big spoon the shit out of you right now
I'm so hungover and dru,k
u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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