so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
Randomize
