Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
Randomize
