well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
Well I just put wine in my tea
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
Randomize
