you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
