drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
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