was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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