she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
