I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
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just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
19 People That Found Pubes In All The Wrong Places
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad