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• (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.

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• (857): View more from Massachusetts

  I'm glad girls dont get visible erections

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  But, it would have made life so much easier...

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• (913): View more from Kansas

  the hot woman interviewing me is reading jokes off the back of laffy taffy.... I'm getting laid and possibly a job

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• (973): View more from New Jersey

  They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.

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• 

  23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce

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• (712): View more from Iowa

  My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!

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• (702): View more from Nevada

  whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want

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• (269): View more from Michigan

  They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring

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• (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.

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• (218): View more from Minnesota

  Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.

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  The 23 Most Inappropriate Things To Happen At A Funeral

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• (302): View more from Delaware

  well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere

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• (678): View more from Georgia

  He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.

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• (908): View more from New Jersey

  it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that

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• (647): View more from Ontario

  you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'

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• (712): View more from Iowa

  The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.

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• (618): View more from Illinois

  He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be

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