whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
Randomize
