AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
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Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
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