I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Randomize