we're blogging at a bar
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
Randomize
