nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
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