had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Randomize
