My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Randomize
