So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
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