Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
Heybabeimwearingurpanties
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
I intend to get homeless drunk
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
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