She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
Randomize
