I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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