Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
