did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
These tits shall not be calmed
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
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