Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(864): View more from South Carolina

sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him

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(828): View more from North Carolina

proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.

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(812): View more from Indiana

I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!

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(646): View more from New York

I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing

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(414): View more from Wisconsin

I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig

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(916): View more from California

Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?

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(618): View more from Illinois

all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse

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(402): View more from Nebraska

Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?

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