It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
you inspire me to be a worse person
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
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