where am i from again
Do vagina's smell?
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
Randomize