bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
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i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
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