Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
Randomize
