I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
