he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
Randomize
