I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
When people ask about my bruises, I'm just going to say it was a doorknob. Or possibly a group of doorknobs. Angry doorknobs.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
