All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Randomize