im drinking this country out of the recession.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
The power of my boobs compel you
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
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