Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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