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Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
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I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
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Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.