im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
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